This is episode five of The Misadventures of Ernest Fletcher Quick. Please download previous episodes before reading this one.
"The winds of change have blown my way more than I care to recall," writes Ernest Fletcher Quick, "and they've given me a stiff neck every time."
That pretty much much sums up Quick's life because he can't seem to stay clear of trouble no matter how hard he tries. Lucky for him (and us), it made him one of the most revered journalists of his era.
In this first installment of his rollicking memoirs he reveals that he, not Teddy Roosevelt, led the charge up San Juan Hill, tells how he managed to not only remember the Maine, but solve the mystery of its destruction, and faced (despite all his best efforts) one of the nastiest villains of the 20th century.
No matter how much he cheats, skulks or runs, Quick--rake, womanizer and dedicated yellow-belly--always survives and comes out smelling like a rose; toasted and honored beyond his wildest dreams, and the favorite of his crazy boss Joseph Pulitzer. (That's a mixed blessing.)
Now, if only he could get Bailey Stewart to fall in love with him.
"Like finding Hunter Thompson in a time warp!"
